Natasha and Kaden’s journey – Fly high sweet Angel xxx

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So our story starts with me being told in July 2014 that I might have to have my left ovary out and that I had that much scar tissue on my right it would be very difficult  to conceive naturally. At that point we decided what the hell if we are going to try it may as well be now, so we did it took us less than 6 months to get pregnant.

We were over the moon.

We found out in November 2014.   I had a tough time being pregnant. I was very sickly the first few months. Then our first tragedy , my partner’s father passed away very suddenly. I did my best to support Stephen and keep things together. it wasn’t easy on either of us.

As my pregnancy progressed we were looking forward to finding out of it was team pink or blue. I really wanted a boy and as Stephen already has a daughter he wanted a boy too (although it wouldn’t have mattered either way).

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Off we went to our 20 week scan, and there he was out baby boy throwing out all sorts of shapes. We both cried and when we came out of the hospital we held each other and cried a little more. We were told out son was healthy and was measuring 2 weeks bigger than he should have been.

The weeks after I suffered a number of complications, dizzy spells, blurred vision, headaches and a pain  just above my ribs. As my blood pressure seemed normal I just put it down to pregnancy illness and my midwife didn’t seem worried.

Then on the 22nd June 2015, the day after father’s day,  I was at work when I felt a tightening in my tummy. I was 34 +5. A lot happens between that I can’t talk about because I don’t really remember it all and the other reason being I was failed by the NHS. 

We were told that our son had no heartbeat, he was moving half an hour before!! I went into shock and just shut down. The next thing I remember is being rushed into the delivery suite and a load of doctors and midwives coming at me with all sorts of drugs. The rest is all a blur.

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I pushed and pushed out a lifeless baby boy into the world at 00:08am on the 23rd June. He weighed 4lbs 13ozI I was distraught. I couldn’t look at him at first. Stephen took over and bathed him and dressed him. I held kaden for  a few minutes and then he went to the family room with Stephen for the night.

I’ll never get over losing kaden and he will always be with me. My baby blue xxx

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About Daddys with Angels.

We began as a group for grieving fathers and men in families, but other family members asked to join us. We now also have a group for Families with Angels dads and other male family members and siblings under 18. We have experienced and live with the harsh pain of loss and we hope we can bring other comfort with what we do, To find us please search for us on face book or www.daddyswithangels.org/. Hugs to you all and floaty kisses to all your angels. We retain the name Daddys With Angels.
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